Pepperoni Sauce

     Page Seventy-Three.
     On page seventy-two of this blog, I wrote about the world's most questionable spaghetti sauce. Let me tell you now of a truly great spaghetti sauce trick.
     It was April, 1912. I was traveling from England to New York by way of the Titanic. It was one of the more interesting experiences I've had in my life. And that's saying something, 'cause I've had some pretty interesting experiences. I mean really. Have you ever sailed on the Titanic? It's not dull. Everybody was trying to outdo everybody else, with all their name dropping and jewels and furs. And the conversations were completely over the top: which is a superior autocar? The McLaren F1 or the Bugatti Veyron. They really were arguing about this, no kidding. Also, some of the other passengers were debating Niece vs.Monaco, which is better? I just wanted to throw up. But still, it was an entertaining trip.
     I was staying in first class, and  on the third night I was eating dinner in the A La Carte Restaurant. I wasn't in the mood for anything too fancy so I ordered the spaghetti with meat sauce. While waiting for my meal, who in the world should appear in the doorway but James Dean? I was really surprised too, because I'd recently read in one of the tabloids that he was busy filming The Wizard Of Oz in Hollywood. That just goes to show how much you can trust the tabloids. He appeared to be alone so I invited him to join me as I was solo too. He was as sullen and moody as is his reputation and he also drank a lot. But he was a nice enough chap; he seemed interested in finding out about me and my interests. It turned out that we both loved the book Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner and also the rock band Joy Division. So we had a lot to talk about. He also ordered the spaghetti.
   By the time dinner showed up we were famished. The salad was great. It was a bed of greens: romaine, butter and arugula with, get this, hot, sauteed onions, red peppers and mushrooms placed on top. Then, blue cheese, whole, marinated, garlic cloves and sweetened cranberries were sprinkled on top of that. It was deadly good. There was also a hot, crusty bread to go with it. But the award really goes to that red sauce. It was a normal meat sauce, but it wasn't. It was spicier than normal and a little sweet. I was deliriously happy while eating it. James liked it too, but he didn't seem to see heaven the way I did.
     I couldn't resist and requested an audience with the executive chef to find out his secret. As it turned out, the executive chef was Marilyn Monroe! I knew that she was quite the cook as I'd read that in a number of different sources (you don't think of Marilyn Monroe as being a strong cook, but she really was). I just was shocked to see her moonlighting as the executive chef on the Titanic. She explained that she had a little time in between film shoots. She'd just finished filming Forrest Gump and had a while prior to pre-production on A Christmas Story. So during her hiatus, she'd acquired this job. (She also had never met James Dean, so it was nice to see them mingle.)
     She was as nice as you can imagine and she told me her trick. After browning the ground beef and sauteeing the onions, add tomato paste and tomato sauce as usual. But then, instead of lots of spices, cut up a good amount of pepperoni and add it, along with a dash of sugar, to the sauce. Let the sauce simmer for an hour or longer. Unless the pepperoni is really bland, the inherent spices will leach out and flavor the sauce beautifully. Marilyn further explained that this trick even works with boring jarred sauce. Pour some jarred sauce into a pan and add the same pepperoni and the same sugar. Let it simmer for an hour and serve. It always works.
     Though I didn't love all aspects of that voyage, I made some good friends and met some interesting people (James Dean and Marilyn Monroe. If that's not enough for you, I don't know who else I could add.) I also learned this amazing trick for spaghetti sauce. The trip was definitely worth it.