Giving Up Church For Lent

     Page Two Hundred Twenty.
     I recently ran into a friend who gave up church for Lent. I'm not kidding. I truly thought she was joking when she told me, but she wasn't. She said that it really hurt her too. She felt terribly deprived by not being able to worship freely and in a manner with which she felt comfortable. After hearing her speak for a moment, I realized her point.

     Can you imagine not being able to worship God in the manner to which you are accustomed or to be ostracized for it? We all know that this has happened countless times over the centuries and in various societies. Also, of course, it still is happening. In the news recently I heard a story about Christians who are harassed in certain Asian countries for praying as they do; Jews have a long history of receiving intolerance and Moslems in Western countries have been the recipients of definite  prejudices since 9.11. And this isn't even to mention the Atheists or Humanists who are force-fed God and organized religion period by extremely ignorant friends or associates. We just can't let people pray, or not, as they see fit, in peace. The more I think about it, the more I respect my friend's decision to give up church for Lent. It really is a sacrifice for her.
     How many people would go to another religion's house of worship for 6 weeks, to the exclusion of their own religion, just to gain a sense of gratitude for their own freedom of worship? Not very many, though they 'd be much less prejudiced afterwards.

What To Give Up For Lent

     Page Two Hundred-Nine.
     I'm sometimes surprised by people's lack of knowledge concerning world religions, or their own religion even. A while ago, I found myself trying to educate a friend on the fact that Jews don't give up anything for Lent. He simply wouldn't hear my explanation. He just "knew" that Lent is an American secular season which is practiced by anybody who wants to express their appreciation to Jesus for dying on that cross 2000 years ago. He recognized it's origins in religion, Christianity specifically, but was convinced that nowadays religion had nothing to do with it. I was stunned by his ignorance.
      Along similar lines, quite recently I found myself talking with a devout Protestant about Martin Luther. I was explaining to her that prior to 500 year ago, there was no such thing as Catholicism or Protestantism. Every Christian was what we would refer to today as Catholic. Then this priest, Martin Luther, came along and virtually invented the Protestant movement. Her response? "I'm going to ask my minister about this. He knows so much about church history, he's just so smart." I thought to myself, "Why didn't this woman learn about the Reformation in 7th grade world history?"
     One day, a few years back, an acquaintance couldn't understand how Jews could believe in God if they didn't simultaneously believe in Jesus. "You see, Jesus is God, so if they don't believe in Jesus then they don't believe in God." Maybe I simply know really uneducated people. Perhaps that's it.
     I believe that if comparative religion were required learning, world-wide, we'd have much less war.

On Studying The Book Of Job

     Page One Hundred Eighty-Two.
     I've been invited to join a monthly Bible study group. Typically, 10, 12 or so people attend this decades-long affair. It's led by a now-retired minister with another retired minister one of the attendees, along with 2 former nuns (now Protestants) and assorted husbands, wives, various tag-a-longs and now, me. I love my life. Positively adore it.
     I think I've been invited because I'm often seen as someone who brings a new or original insight to whatever spiritual or religious issue is being discusses. I suspect my Jewishness played some into the decision to invite me, but not heavily. I'm just immensely curious about the Bible and what it has to say. And, people who talk with me about religious or spiritual subjects pick up on that really fast.
     I disagree with much of the Bible's teachings and am fairly open about that. I also disagree with much of the history which is taken as Biblical fact. But I think what strikes people quickly is my knowledge. So many people who disagree with this verse or that don't really know much about the Bible itself. I do know it critically; though admittedly nowhere near as much as these retired ministers or nuns, but some. Probably more than the typical church/synagogue attending American, in fact. I'm so intensely interested in it.
     It's human nature to have issues with beliefs or attitudes which affect you negatively or disagree with the way you were raised. But that's where most people stop. They choose to get angry and then stay in the anger without speaking with those people or reading and studying the books which these people quote. I, on the other hand, was raised to believe in educated dialogue. Not debate or argument, mind you, but friendly, open and educated discourse. Subsequently, if I have an issue with, say, the occasionally held 18th and 19th century belief that slavery is sanctioned by the Bible, then I better find out all I can about the entire book and even more about those specific verses which are quoted by those believers. And this is just one example.
     So the first class I'll be attending,

The Book Of Job

in a few weeks, will be on the book of Job. I know a little about that book, but not much. I was told that's perfectly fine and not to worry about my lack of education. Well I can't help it. There's a massive over-achiever in me that won't always stay camouflaged. I've already taken down some books from my bookshelf and begun studying. That is one seriously fascinating book.
     And, maybe most importantly, dinner is included. You know those old church ladies can cook. This hostess is allegedly a magnificent cook, too. I'm not allowed to bring a thing. (They specifically told me that.)  A free Protestant meal, and all I have to do is show up and be contrary. Yum, Yum, Yum!!!

On Decorating For Rosh Hashanah

     Page One Hundred Twenty-Two.
     Right now I'm sitting at my dining room table, writing this blog. Besides my computer, the other things on the table are many decorations for Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, which is in a few weeks. The reason they're here is because I'll be using them in a couple days to decorate one window at the beauty salon which I manage. Decorating a window for Rosh Hashanah is mostly no big deal. But if you remember from a couple blogs ago (page #119) the salon is almost exclusively African-American. However, here's the thing: my boss, Alma, knew what she was getting herself into when she asked me to be the manager. She knew that my world view is a bit odd, overly embracing and quite rebellious.
     Last spring I decorated one window for the Jewish holiday of Purim and I decorated another one for St. Patrick's Day. Of all things, I didn't do one for Easter because one of our two windows was broken at the time and the other window was set with something that Alma and I both liked, though I don't now remember what it was. (Also, that was the week that I was hosting the Passover Seder at the church, and was cooking for 260 people. So, I took the entire week off from the salon anyhow.) Alma, the beauty salon and I are all in Cleveland Heights, Ohio, an unusually ecumenical and integrated community. If I can't get away with decorating a black beauty salon for all the Jewish holidays in this city, I can't do it anywhere. And I want to.
     It doesn't go unnoticed either. Last spring while the windows had their St. Pat's theme, some drunken bar hopping patrons who were staggering by, were overheard to say "why do those ni****s have their salon decorated for St. Patrick's Day?" (The salon is on a street heavily occupied by popular restaurants and bars.) But also, earlier this summer, I received word that my windows had been nominated for the best decorated windows in Cleveland Heights. So there you go.
     Actually the salon clients love it. Alma is a devout Christian as are many of her clients. They love the fact that I embrace and then talk about my Jewishness because Jesus was Jewish. So they're fascinated by our holidays. As far as I'm concerned, anything which keeps my creativity popping is good. And doing those windows for various holidays, Jewish and otherwise, definitely pops my creativity.

Teaching A Kid To Cook

     Page Ninety-Seven.
     Well, that was fast. Last week I mentioned that my job with the boys had ended for the summer. I wrote that I figured something would come along. It probably has and I start today.
     A long time acquaintance approached me about helping her with an interesting situation. Okay... follow me closely here.
     My acquaintance's name is Deb. Some years ago, she befriended a woman named Gretchen. Gretchen had some VERY serious issues with drugs and alcohol but when she was clean she was quite pleasant and charming. They gradually became close to the point that Deb saw Gretchen as the daughter she never had. (Deb is a single, former hippie.) Over the years Gretchen had three sons with, I think, the same man. Those sons today are 21, 19 and 15.
     Gretchen was never able to stay clean for very long, but she could occasionally stay sober for a year or two. She and her sons moved in with Deb five or six or seven years ago. Two years ago the father died of an overdose. Shortly thereafter, Gretchen started using again. At that point, Deb told Gretchen that she should sign her youngest over to her because Deb didn't want him to end up in the state foster system when the inevitable happened. Gretchen did sign over guardianship to Deb sometime in 2011 I think. Gretchen then died of an overdose one year ago, spring of 2012.
     Today, the oldest is a mess, in and out of jail; he has no interest in living a clean life. The middle is extremely responsible. He has a stable job at Bob Evans and is a strong student at Cleveland State University studying pre-law. He also lives next door to Deb. The youngest, Shem, lives with Deb and is as angry as you can imagine.
     Both Gretchen and the dad were Jewish and Judaism is huge on welfare. One of the local Orthodox Jewish day schools knows of the situation and is giving Shem free tuition until he graduates, $18,000 per year, even though nobody was Orthodox. That's just the way Jewish communities operate. This person talks to this person who talks to this person. Then organizations find out about conditions and before you know it, scholarships are established even though there may just be a peripheral association. (Deb is an office manager. She makes enough to support two but not enough to pay for private school.) Thankfully, Shem enjoys school very much.
     But, Shem takes much of his anger out on Deb, which is natural and Deb knows it. Of the many superficial, sticking points, is food. Of all the things this kid has to be angry about, food is absorbing much of his energy. (Of course, it's just an excuse to lash out.) Deb's never had to learn how to cook and she's vegetarian. So Shem carries on about how she's trying to starve him. Deb has spent a fortune on carry-out over the last year and Shem won't touch it. He keeps talking about learning to cook but he won't say what he wants to learn to cook. He challenges Deb to read his mind, basically. That's where I come in.
     At first I was contacted to see about delivering ready-made meals. Then the plan changed and now Deb is thinking that because I'm a stranger, then perhaps Shem will communicate with me and allow me to teach him how to cook. Deb admitted that she really should have taken care of this issue a year ago. But the fact is, she's been mourning the loss of her very dear friend, besides having to raise this deeply troubled boy. So, in one hour I'm supposed to go shopping with Deb and begin my little summer escapade.
     Wish me luck. The fact is, I really do have experience working with troubled youth, though I prefer normal, difficult, obnoxious teenagers with no real excuses to ones with actual problems. Of course, I'm walking into this with hopes that I can help. We'll see. At the very least, it'll keep him occupied a few hours per week.